Lt. Charles Margiotta, 23 Years later

 Lt. Charles "Chuck" Margiotta was born January 15, 1957. He led a life of fun, excitement and love. His fun and excitement included being a stuntman, substituting, being a private investigator, and coaching his kids in sports. He loved his family, neighbors, community, and his job.  He was a firefighter for the NYFD for 20 years until his life was cut short being a hero.

When I read stories of Chuck, I am amazed at the love he had for those around him, and cherishing the small things. He loved to garden and had a garden at the fire station that he loved to tend to, mainly his tomatoes. He loved to help his neighbors and once ran out into the street to help an elderly neighbor who had fallen. According to his friends, he was the nicest tough guy they'd ever met.

The morning of September 11th, he was driving home after being on shift all night long, when he heard over the radio that the Twin Towers had been struck. He turned around and headed back to see how he could help. He phoned his parents to tell them that something big had happened, and that he loved them. He didn't know that he would soon be part of American history. 

This historic day is bigger than Chuck, and all of us. It's a defining moment in American history. A day many of us will never forget, but we must keep that memory alive so that we do not have a repeat of that day. Heroes were born that day and courage was found among many. 

For Chuck, he wanted to help the people of New York by getting many to safety. He wanted to save lives, as he was called to do. I hope that we call all find a little Chuck in ourselves. His death may have been tragic, but his life lives on in the people who remember him. 

He was not someone who would call themselves a hero, as he was merely doing his job. He would probably shrug his shoulders and be humble about it. 

September 11, 2001 is a day that will live in infamy. So many of us will never forget where we were or what we were doing when the news of the attacks hit.  It is our duty, and our responsibility to remember the lives who were lost in the attacks. They all matter, from the janitor, to the executive, firefighters, police officers, and all of those affected. We must remember this day, because by doing so we remember those who were lost. 

Chuck, so long as I'm alive, and my fingers still work, I will always remember you here on this blog, and everyday in my heart. As this date gets closer every year, I struggle to find the words to say, as so many have already been said. I try to honor you in a way that the future generations would be proud of. 

I think back to that day, and my 17 year old self, and I can't fathom not understanding what was happening and how generations of American's would be affected. We knew the impact at that time, but we didn't realize how it would impact us years down the road.  I still tear up when I think about those moments in time, they are forever ingrained in my mind. The clothes I wore, the teacher that stopped me, my eyes on the tv, me running down the hall, and the aftermath in the coming days. 

As I homeschool our son, I always make this day about learning more about the events of September 11th. It's important that the future generations understand how life changing those moments in time were. They will never truly grasp the feelings as it was all happening, but hopefully they can get a sense of pride in what the country did in the days after. 

Chuck, we will never forget.

Click here to donate to Chuck's Scholarship fund

The Story of 9/11 Belongs to All of Us

 Today marks the 22nd anniversary of 9/11. Many of us look back and remember the events of that day. A day filled with fear, terror, tears, camaraderie, and heroism. While people were running from the terror, heroes were running towards it. Many heroes of this story have perished, and those that survived are passing as the years go by, some from the sickness of the toxins that filled the air, and some of age. We still remember the living and the dead of that day. 

As a Social Studies lesson today we watched the 9/11 Anniversary Digital Learning Experience with survivors, first responders, and school teachers. I try to find something new every year for our little guy to watch. He's only 11, but we try to teach him the history of this day and the days following. Reminding him that we should never forget, even if we weren't alive to have a first hand account of 9/11.  It's important to keep the memory alive of all who were lost during this tragedy on American soil. 

I was 17 years old in 2001, and a senior in high school. I remember the day like it was yesterday. We were scared as a class, but we came together as one as well. Nothing was learned that day in any class as we stared at the tv's and talked about how we felt. It was a terrifying, yet somber day. We worried about loved ones, people we knew, and all of the families out there that were suffering a great loss. In the film it featured, Ada Dolch, principal of the High School for Leadership and Public Service in lower Manhattan, and she said "We were hungry for anything that would bring us joy, and lift our spirits." I believe that to be true, because in the days following 9/11 I felt the exact same way. The thought of "how do we forge ahead?" was a burning question in many minds. 

We have forged ahead, but we will never forget because the story of 9/11 belongs to ALL of us.

Tracking down a lead as a private investigator

 There is one man that I will continue to honor, Lt. Charles Margiotta, a firefighter for the FDNY, Battalion 22. He had just finished a 24-hour shift and was heading home when he heard the call over the radio. He turned around to go back to ground zero. Little did he know that he would become a hero that we remember today. 

He was an all around great guy, friend, husband, son, brother, and gardener. The stories that I have found tell the tale of a man who was a helper, a friend, a caregiver, and a hero. I don't believe that he would consider himself a hero though, as he loved doing his job and helping people. 

"He was like a renaissance man,'' said Charlie Margiotta, Chuck's father. "He did everything. He was a hunter, he was a fisherman, he was a part-time actor. He did stunts for the movies, about 10 Hollywood movies.'' 

According to his brother, Mike, he was a larger than life character. He said he was into everything and wondered when he had time to sleep. He was a stuntman, firefighter, private investigator, substitute teacher, and a soccer coach. 

Remembering him has been a great honor throughout the years, and this year I'm at a loss for words. I'm lost today, and a feeling of sadness has washed over me. I have suffered my own loss in the last couple of weeks that has left me without words to convey the memory of Lt. Charles Margiotta properly. While my loved one was not lost in a tragedy that millions will remember, she was lost to health issues. It's hard to imagine what his family felt at that time as I deal with my own loss. 

Chuck, you are remembered and never forgotten. I try to keep your memory alive by teaching my little guy all about the events of that tragic day. While millions of people may not know your name, they remember all who have been lost. Thank you for your service, your bravery, and your heroism. 

To read last years blog 21 Years Later, We will Remember Lt. Charles Margiotta 

To donate to the Chuch Margiotta Scholarship Fund.

*all pictures used with permission

Stay At Home Mom thoughts

 I know I don't blog much anymore on here, except for my once a year September 11th posts, but I had some thoughts this afternoon while washing dishes.  I don't know how soap is so magical, or maybe it's the running water, but every time I do the dishes or I get in the shower, I have profound thoughts. Is it the soap or the running water?  I'll never know, but it's cleansing to the soul somehow. 

Stay at home moms are under appreciated. I think the world thinks we sit around on our couches watching the newest episode of Real Housewives while sipping wine and eating bon bons.  It could not be more opposite of that.  Let me paint you a picture.  I get up in the morning, get dressed, take care of the dogs, make my coffee, homeschool the boy, start laundry, and do dishes.  That all happens before lunch time. It continues after lunch too.  There is always more laundry, more dishes, more dogs to swap out, and much more to do. It's a never ending cycle. I can't remember the last time I actually sat down on the couch and watched tv during the week. I usually turn on a show while I fold the laundry and then turn it off when I'm done.

I know my husband goes to work during the day and works hard for our family. I thank him for all he does and make sure the kids understand that without dad's hard work we wouldn't have the things we have. I don't want them to think that material things just appear out of thin air. Without him we wouldn't have a whole lot. I'm thankful he works hard doing a job that he loves. 

The flip side of that is stay at home moms. No one thanks them for a nice dinner, they only complain when it doesn't taste good. No one thanks them for clean laundry, they just put it on like it's another day. No one thanks them for a clean house that they get to come home to. No one thanks them for taking care of their children or giving them a quality education, its just questioned when it isn't done correctly. It's a thankless job that's expected of us no matter what. Even when I was a working mom I was expected to do all of those things without any help. 

Moms, whether being a stay at home mom or a working mom, don't get vacation days.  We don't get time off to just chill. When we come home from work we keep running, because it's what we do. Men come home from work, kick off their shoes, and relax. Mom's don't relax, even when our heads hit the pillows, we are constantly thinking about all of the things tomorrow brings and we are making a game plan. We take care of everyone constantly and someone always needs something. 

I don't complain much because I know that not everyone is in the position we are in. Some moms have to work. Unfortunately as the world gets more expensive, people have to sacrifice and it's a hard one to make. I know I don't sound grateful, but I am. I'm grateful to have a hard working husband who has busted his rear throughout the years to be appreciated in his line of work. That allows me to stay home. I have sacrificed to. I sacrificed my education to give the little guy a good education. I only have one shot at giving him the best education I can. I have many opportunities to go back to school. Will I? I'm not sure, but that time we maybe in a position of travelling and enjoying life without caring for someone here at home. I'm not sure what the future holds, so I take it one day at a time. Do I have dreams for my life? Yes, but I realize that I'm getting older and my dreams today look different than they did 10 years ago. 

All that to say, if you have a mom, stay at home or working, in your life, thank them for the small stuff. What we do goes unnoticed until we don't do it. We are not second class citizens because we are women, we do the hard things to. When you're a stay at home mom providing for your family looks a little bit different, but it's still hard. Maybe we don't leave the house to go to work, but we are always working. 

21 Years Later, We Still Remember Lt. Charles Margiotta

 

This year, like many others, I struggle to find the words to convey the heartache I feel each year on September 11th.  I dread this day, but find solace in remembering someone that gave his life to save others. It's been 21 years, but I think we can all remember exactly what we were doing on this very day in 2001.

Lt. Charles Margiotta, Chuck as he was lovingly referred to, was described as the "toughest nice guy around." He helped neighbors, gardened at the fire station, his favorite being the tomatoes, was a stunt man, a private investigator, and a friend.  He leaves behind a wife, son and daughter, as well as many friends and family.  He was a 1979 graduate of Brown University, with two degrees in English and Sociology, and was a member of their 1976 Ivy League champion football team where he was posthumously inducted into the Hall of Fame.  

Chuck leaves behind a great legacy, one of friendship, caring for his neighbors, helping the elderly, substituting on his time off, and loving people. He was an amazing man, according to many articles written about him.  It's unfortunate that I, as well as many others, have to learn about his extraordinary life via the internet.  I think we would all be better people if we had gotten to meet him in person.  I don't think he met many strangers, I think they were all friends upon meeting. 

I read in an article that his parents lived next door to him and he would check on them everyday. The last phone call he would make would be to his mom saying "Ma, it's bad, I love you. I'll call you later." His dad missed the trips to the mountains, watching sports on tv, and tailgating at the Giants games. His mom missed the pretzel crumbs he would often leave behind. He had a great relationship with his community and his neighbors, as well as his family.  

I have had the great privilege to communicate with his brother Mike on a few occasions. My goal in this life is to gather more stories about Chuck over coffee with Mike and to be able to continue to share his legacy. Chuck was courageous, as he heard the call over the radio on his way home from a 24-hour shift at a Brooklyn fire station, where he was filling in for someone else.  He turned around and found himself staring evil in the face.  He helped save many lives while losing his.  I see his face when I think about September 11th. 

Several years ago, as I have written before, my husband and I were watching a 9/11 special and at the end they showed pictures of all of the service men and women who lost their lives that day.  As Chucks picture popped up on the screen I shouted "That's him. That's the guy I honor every year.  That's Lt. Charles Margiotta." I'm so thankful that many years ago I signed up to honor someone who gave their last breath so that others could continue to take theirs. I get to know more about Chuck every year and that's what I'm most thankful for. I get to share with others what Chuck was all about, funny stories, and memories from family and friends. 

Every year I donate to the Chuck Margiotta Scholarship Fund and this year was no exception.  As I told my husband, it brought me to tears. I look at my son eating his dino nuggets and he has no idea the impact that September 11th has had on our generation. He'll never understand how hard it is for me to memorialize someone in words. He'll never know the impact it had on our country, but tomorrow our Social Studies and Science lessons will be all about September 11th because it's important that he understand. We don't hide things from him or keep him from understanding how horrible this day was for many American's.  When we talk about it each year, he's angry, and he doesn't understand what could drive people to do this kind of harm to one another.  I will tell him about Chuck so that he remains alive, if only in our hearts and in this blog. 

Chuck led a life worth remembering. 

I have linked the scholarship fund above if you care to donate.  Last years blog isn't hard to find as I really only use this blog anymore to honor him, but it can be read here.

*all pictures have been used with permission

2001-2021 9/11 Lt. Charles Margiotta

 Where do I begin? 20 years ago today we witnessed a terrible tragedy on our own soil, an attack like no other. Many lives were lost that day and many were just beginning. The toll it took our on Nation was great, but seeing our country come together was greater. 

I was a measly 17 year old starting my senior year in high school. We watched on tv all day long and none of us got anything accomplished. Our hearts were torn, and we learned to value life and friendships then. We understood, even at a young age, that life was precious and that at any moment it could be taken from any one of us. What we didn’t understand is the impact it would have on our lives later.

A few years later my friend told me about signing up to blog about someone who had lost their life to 9/11, a first responder, a hero, friend, father, brother, and son. That’s exactly what I did. Today we honor him and all of the men and women who lost their lives that day.

Today I honor Lt. Charles (Chuck) Margiotta, a brother, friend, son, husband, and father.  His memory will, and should, live on. Lt. Margiotta, as long as I live you will never be forgotten, for the things I have learned about you in the many years after 9/11 will always be with me. You were a force in your community and you loved fiercely. You gave your life 20 years ago so that others could go home to their families.  I know you wouldn’t want to be called a hero, but that’s exactly what you are. According to Merriam-Webster a hero is “a person who is admired for great or brave acts or fine qualities.” You possessed all of those things. You helped people when you weren’t called, and you gave your very last breath being brave for others. 

Last night in football stands all across America you were remembered.  My daughter is in the band and the tribute to first responders and the fallen was incredible.  I felt it in my soul and I saw your face when I closed my eyes to remember all who were lost. While many people remember seeing things on the news and not knowing a face attached to it, I’m fortunate enough to have gotten to know you through countless articles, and conversations with your brother, Michael.  He’s been a huge support in helping me to keep your memory alive and he’s doing a wonderful job of it himself.  You live on in the hearts of many today, even if they never had the pleasure of getting to know you. I know that your family is proud of you and I vow to meet them someday and share a coffee in your honor.  I know you loved tending to the tomatoes, so today I pick them with great pride from my garden in memory of you.

I’m reminded every year of your bravery, sacrifice, humility and heroism to our country. A country you gave your last breath to.  Thank you so much for your service Chuck, you will never be forgotten.  God Bless America. 

If you’d like to donate to his scholarship fund you can do so here.

To learn more about Chuck please check out his Memorial Website. 

Check out last years blog post.  

19 Years Lt. Charles Joseph Margiotta

It’s been 19 years since you left us in one of the worst attacks on US soil. 19 years since you died trying to save the people of the country you loved and called home. I sit here today dumbfounded on what to actually write.  Every year I struggle to find the words, struggle to put them all together, and struggle with my emotions. I was just a young 17 year old high schooler trying to find my way in the world, when it all happened.  

As a country we came together in unity. We supported and looked out for one another. We helped our neighbors, we talked to everyone like they were our best friend, and we loved fiercely.  At 17 I saw and felt the effects of this.  I watched classmates cry, scream, and worry.  I watched the planes hit the WTC, and I cried for the loss of our country.  I watched a nation vow to help their fellow man and in the years following that it all fell apart. 

Chuck your service may not be remembered by all, and I didn’t even know you, but it has impacted me since that fateful day in 2001.  Your work will be revered by all in the following years, I will make sure you are never forgotten. 

I vowed many years ago to learn something new about Chuck and to let all of the world know just what kind of person he was and how he will always be remembered. According to a Staten Island Advanced article Chuck was always looking out for his neighbors. He was always helping people and looking out for the underdog.  You would often find him helping his neighbors by helping the elderly that had fallen in the street.  He was also an avid gardener who took care of the tomato plants at Ladder Co. 85 in New Dorp.  He was an avid lover of the outdoors as well, and once he had kids he just rearranged his schedule so that he could enjoy the things he loved. 

In college he would bring home classmates who didn’t have a place to go for Thanksgiving. He would plow every sidewalk on the block when it snowed. He was helping to save lives in the outdoors as well  as he once gave mouth-to-straw-to-beak resuscitation to a bird that had fallen from a tree.  He was always giving himself to others. 

On his way to the WTC he called his mom, Molly, told her it was bad and that he loved her.  He couldn’t get ahold of his wife because she was working. Those would be the last words his family heard from him. 

Today we remember the sacrifices you gave for this great nation in which you and I call home.  I hope you know the impact you’ve had on me since I’ve been privileged enough to write about you.  I know you would never consider yourself a hero, but you’re one to me and your family.  

This year I donated to his scholarship fund, you can do so here. 

To read my first blog post about Lt. Charles Margiotta and last years blog post. 

If you want to learn more about this wonderful hero, please visit his families memorial website. 

*photos used with permission

Light On

Dearest Daughter,

  I know you’re struggling mentally. Life isn’t easy, and it’s full of twists and turns, many of which you never see coming.  Friends are hard in the early years, and maintaining relationships is even harder.  I have been battling depression since after you were born, it’s not your fault, always remember that.  I know it’s hard, and somedays its all I have to get from one day to the next, and often times you never see that side.  I talk to dad about it when he gets home, I talk to him, have a conversation with him, and I’m real with him.  I hide nothing.  He’s my best friend in life and the person who can help me through so much. Someday you will have that special someone who you can talk to about it all.

  I know that talking to me is hard, sometimes its not easy, and you think I will judge you.  You don’t need to judgment, you need someone to listen to you, and to give you loving advice. Dad and I can be that person for you.  We have struggled through things in our lives just like you are experiencing now, but we have to leave the light on for each other.

  I was watching a movie the other day and the ending song said “If you leave the light on, then I’ll leave the light on.”  We have to leave the light on for each other.  I have to leave the light on so that you feel like you can talk to me at any time.  I will always listen.  You have to leave the light on and remain open to talking to me.  It’s like a door opening, if we leave the door open at all times, then the open communication is there.  I don’t want you talking to other moms unless you plan to tell me as well. They can’t help you like your own mom can, and I need and want to know what’s going on in your world.  I love you very much, and we have to be open with each other.  Know at the end of the day that you’ll still be dancing!


So to you I say “If you leave the light on, then I’ll leave the light on.”

"Light On" by Maggie Rogers

Would you believe me now
If I told you I got caught up in a wave?
Almost gave it away
Would you hear me out if I told you I was terrified for days?
Thought I was gonna break

Oh, I couldn't stop it
Tried to slow it all down
Crying in the bathroom
Had to figure it out
With everyone around me saying
You must be so happy now

Oh, if you keep reaching out
Then I'll keep coming back
And if you're gone for good
Then I'm okay with that
If you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

And I am finding out
There's just no other way
That I'm still dancing at the end of the day
If you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

And do you believe me now
That I always had the best intentions, babe?
Always wanted to stay
Can you feel me now
That I'm vulnerable in oh-so many ways?
Oh, and I'll never change

Oh, I couldn't stop it
Tried to figure it out
But everything kept moving
And the noise got too loud
With everyone around me saying
"You should be so happy now"

Oh, if you keep reaching out
Then I'll keep coming back
And if you're gone for good
Then I'm okay with that
And if you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

And I am finding out
There's just no other way
That I'm still dancing at the end of the day
If you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

Oh, leave the light on
Oh, would you leave the light on?

If you keep reaching out
Then I'll keep coming back
But if you're gone for good
Then I'm okay with that
If you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

And I am finding out
There's just no other way
That I'm still dancing at the end of the day
If you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on (Light on, light on, light on)

Oh, if you leave the light on
Then I'll leave the light on
Oh, if you leave the light on